Kevin’s Pub Dublin would be an actual Irish pub, since it would be in Ireland. It would probably immediately fail, since it would be run by an American, so it’s a good thing I applied for Irish citizenship. Then it can fail, because I’ve never actually run a pub.

Once I am an Irish citizen, I will have the citizenship story to tell my patrons while they’re sitting at the bar.

One note – don’t apply for a grandfathered Irish citizenship the same year that Brexit is enacted, and the Irish get flooded with requests from Brits who want to be Irish so they’re still European.

On the bright side, they probably will all need a drink after the process. Here’s my favorite quote from the procedure – the application said I needed my granddad’s marriage license or other proof of name change. He never changed his name, so I thought it wasn’t needed. However, since all the paperwork had to be shipped to Dublin, I thought I would ask first.

I tried asking the Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade on their Facebook page, and got a response very quickly that they couldn’t answer specific questions on Facebook. I wondered what generic questions they would get. Then, I wondered why “do I need my granddad’s marriage license?” was too specific, but then I decided to call.

The first time, I got a recording that they were very busy and some other info, and then it hung up on me. My first international hang-up! A couple hours later, I tried again, and after eight minutes on hold, I got a person.

I explained the question and he said, “You need to send the marriage license, even though there is no use for it whatsoever.” Emphasis on the whatsoever, in an Irish lilt. So, I sent it. Then, I asked if I needed my divorce paperwork (10+ pages) and both of my marriage licenses. He said, “No…. but if you have them around..” So, I sent it. Then, I asked if we could send my application with my little brother’s, since all of our ancestors were the same. He said “of course”, so I wrote a cover letter, just in case.

We’re waiting. The estimate on the website went from six months to a year. We’re almost at a year, but they haven’t added in the COVID-19 delays yet, I’m sure.

I’m hoping to have the citizenship paperwork before I die. Then, I will open a pub in Dublin, even though there is no use for another one whatsoever.

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